Thursday, January 22, 2009

What goes up....

Must come down.

I've noticed I've had a major setback in terms of getting a handle on my depression lately.
I'm getting that anxious feeling again.
The kind where I feel like I don't belong and that all I do is get in everyone's way.
I'm crying a lot more and I'm not sleeping again. I'm unmotivated and it's killing me.

It leaves me feeling socially inept and as though I'm talked down to or seen as an overemotional idiot.

It leave me feeling like an outsider and it tears me up inside.

I can not tell you how horrible a feeling it is to think something is wrong with you to the point you feel as though you will never fit in. That you ARE the problem.

I do have to admit that I've been lucky to find some really great friends during this journey who no matter what they are people I can hang out with and talk to. They don't exclude me and they most of all just really get me.

But I also don't want to be a burden to them.

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